HOLIDAY CHILL

What’s your REAL goal for the holidays? What makes you happy, and what do you truly hate to do? Well, to help us create the holidays that will really bring us the Spirit of the Season, we’re getting some down to earth and darn practical help from Melissa Gross man of HATCH! And it only takes 3 Easy Steps. Let’s listen in…

“Thirty-five years ago I first watched A Charlie Brown Christmas, and haven’t missed a year since. The irony threading through it was lost on me (because I was five) but I loved it, anyway. Still do, and not just because Charlie Brown’s struggle to simply enjoy the holidays in spite of commercialism’s pressures is as apt in 2009 as it was when the show first aired in 1965.

For many of us, the holidays get harder every year, not easier.  On the night of  December 25^th when we’re too tired to appreciate the good dinner digesting in our bellies, and the new slippers on our feet, we pledge that next year will be different.  It will.  We swear.   We triple dog dare ourselves to not make good on this promise.  And then we doze off for the next 10.5 months and forget.  When the next Black Friday rolls around, the same draining cycle starts anew, and once again we feel let down and emptied by the season that’s supposed to infuse us with a lasting cache of magic and meaning

The upside (whew! there’s an upside): you already know the essence of what you want Christmas to be. It’s the execution side of things that gets you tetchy, because it probably involves some hard choices, maybe saying no to stuff you’ve never said no to before, dodging some expectations, and wrestling with ‘shoulds.’  However, I’m a firm believer that stumbling and bumbling your way to a new holiday tack is better than not tacking at all.

So with that in mind, let’s roll up our sleeves and see what we can cogitate together.

Step One: It’s All In Your Head

Grab pen, paper, and a button (preferably a big one, if you have it.)   If you don’t have your stash of buttons in easy reach, don’t worry about it. You can root around for one later.  For now, the pen and paper suffice.  Fortify yourself with a hot toddy as necessary.

At the top of the paper, write the word “Vision”.  Underline it.

Next, imagine it’s 11:45 PM on December 25^th. Every body else is tucked in bed, but you’re tucked into your “thinking spot”, wherever you go to think about life.  If you’re away from home and your thinking spot, imagine a comfortable substitute where at this very moment you’re thinking about how this Christmas has been different from the others, in a good way, and how that makes you feel.

Now, start jotting the details as to what made it different.  You can write in snippets, bullet points, hanging participles.  Just record the details as they most readily present themselves.  Perfect has no place in this exercise, by the way. Perfectionism will argue against this but no matter. It can yammer all it likes, but we are not listening.

Spend about five or ten minutes on this step.  You don’t need a complete picture, just enough to have something to work with.  You know it’s time to stop when you suspect you’re making up stuff to fill up the page… or your brain gets easily distracted.

Look over what you’ve written.  If you were to sum up this vision in one word, what would it be? Some examples: family, funny, light, quiet, twosome, snowflakes, goosedowny.  This is the essence of the season that is the alpha hen in your pecking order of holiday priorities. This doesn’t have to be a word that’s actually on your sheet of paper. For whatever word you write down, only you need to understand what it symbolizes and the dots it connects. If it resonates for you, it’s a winner.

Step Two:  The Tricky Bit

It’s good to have a vision and your symbolic word, but you won’t experience the impact of either unless you put them into practice. I’m sorry!  That’s the ooky part you knew was coming and were probably dreading. I hope you’ll gather your druthers and play along anyway.  (Besides, you can always revert back to the status quo, and only you will be the wiser.

Next step: a fresh sheet of paper.  At the top write,  “I will…”.  Underline that phrase.

Now – quickly, quickly, before your doubts and your ‘shoulds’ intrude  – underneath those two words write five or six steps you can take to work towards that vision.  Again, write in bullet points, snippets, hanging participles.  Only YOU need to be able to read your handwriting. If you get stuck, refer back to the details from your vision page. Every detail you wrote earlier conveys an answer, an option.

This is your “action plan”.  It might be rough, but it’s ready enough.  Go with it.  See what shakes out.  Tweak as needed.  Always, keep the end result that is your vision in mind.

If you can immediately act on any of your action steps – like checking the “regrets” box on an invitation, crossing off acquaintances from the card list, having the nativity play costume hemmed by a tailor – all the better. You’ll be less likely to waffle if you embrace your intentions while they’re fresh and warm.

Step Three:  A “Remember!” Button

When you feel the ‘shoulds’ and pressures pressing on you in the coming weeks, your button is your buddy.  (This is your cue to dig out a spare button.)  Get a button big enough so you can feel it when you reach into your pockets, because that’s its home from now till December 25th. It’s there to remind you of the vision you hold in both noggin and soul.  Which is just as well, because that’s where the holiday spirit hangs out, too.”

Wow! Melissa, thanks. Three simple steps that will not only help us create the holidays we want, but can be used anytime we need a jump start in bringing a vision to life! THANKS!

Meet Melissa.